Perspectives on Race

A Discussion about Events Concerning Race

what if..

with 6 comments

As we’ve been reading “Racism Without Racists”  you see respondents continuously say one thing and do another. I began to analyze my own life and my relationships. I have no problem dating people outside my race, but I have problems bringing guys, of any race home to meet my parents. I started to wonder what my parents would think if I brought someone home to meet them who wasn’t white. I asked my mom and she did as many of the respondents in the book did. She paused and then attempted to be politically correct. She fell into many of the same traps that society has lead us to believe are ok. My favorite part was when she tried to act like she would have no problem with it and that my dad was the one I needed to get passed. I think my mom, like so many other people in our society do, projected her feelings onto another person to protect herself and avoid sounding racist. She then proceeded to tell me that bringing a hispanic guy home was better than bringing a black guy home. I was shocked, and then angry. How could my mom, of all people, be saying this to me? Shouldn’t she just want me to be happy? What makes someone’s skin color so important? It doesn’t change the person.. I can’t believe it took me 18 years to figure out that my mom, and potentially my dad, weren’t as accepting of people as I thought. This makes me realize how easy it is for parents to raise their kids  to be prejudice, even if only as a subconscious level.

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Written by lehnertsl

February 12, 2010 at 3:17 am

Posted in Uncategorized

6 Responses

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  1. If I were you I wouldn’t judge my parents soley based off of that one opinion. I bet if all of us asked our parents similer question we would probably get responses that we didn’t expect, however I wouldn’t hold your parents as intolerent. Colorblindness affects almost all whites and is an unfortunate affect of our society that hopefully eventually will go away. But I would not hold your parents totally responsible.

    matthewcel

    February 12, 2010 at 5:29 am

  2. I think it takes an extremely brave individual to confront their own parents with tough questions like the one you ask. I think many people would never do so because they are afraid of the answers they would hear. I also think you did a really great thing because by making people voice their opinion, hopefully you can make them realize just how wrong they sound. Still, I don’t think you should throw your parents under the bus, i think you should use this class as an opportunity to teach them and hopefully change their minds about minorities.

    mzlisarenee

    February 12, 2010 at 6:12 am

  3. I have to agree with the previous posters…your parents right now are coming off to you as close-minded but in actuality, they’re human too and they fall victim to society’s undesired structure even if they don’t mean to; they’re not bad people, just uneducated on the topic. I couldn’t have said it better than the previous poster: use this opportunity to talk to your parents about everything you’ve been talking about in this class—asking for their opinion on the matter was the hardest part, now just share what you know in hopes that they’ll listen and take it to heart.

    devaio24

    February 12, 2010 at 3:50 pm

  4. I really don’t know if my mom would be upset if I was to bring home someone outside my race. I would assume she would be okay but we have to understand that our parents grew up in a different time than us and of course they know how people can be so they make assumptions because of what they witnessed in the past. i am someone who finds beauty in eversy single race and to only admire men in my race is something that I never could do when their are beautiful people everywhere. I know the only thing I will be concerned about when my child brings someone home is that they love each other and are treating each other right. For God’s sake, it’s only color it’s not like the person’s a martian.

    alyssa1965

    February 12, 2010 at 10:06 pm

  5. I know for a fact that my parents would not be happy with me if I came home with a guy of a different race. My mother is very closed minded as is my whole family because of this, I’m very picky about who I bring home or date in general.

    melp8

    February 13, 2010 at 1:59 am

  6. Yea, I’m glad this book as well as this class is opening the eyes of someone. It’s called aversive racism. I don’t care what everyone is saying. I feel all homes have some type of subconscious view of other races that may not always be good. The view could have came from tv, sterotypes, and/or just ignorant. And yes blame your parents they influence you!.. If they WANTED to just like every individual in this class they would go learn about these cultures and/or different races and see that they are just like regular people. Not all blacks are drug dealers, not all whites are extremely rich, not all hispanics are immigrants stealing jobs from Americans, not all asians are ..you get the point.

    ineeduf

    February 14, 2010 at 1:20 am


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